I’m going to follow my dreams! I asked my dad for some device that will help improve my flexibility. I want to be able to splits! Then I’ll feel like I can do anything! lol. I’m going to lose him, but I’ll have my passion. Now, I just need a job!! lol. Then I can take 500 hours of ballet a week and be the person I’ve always dreamed of!
lol. I have to think of one!!!!
So, he doesn’t love me anymore, but we’re gonna stay together until I can be strong on my own. I had three days of just plain crying. I couldn’t even function properly. I burned some mac and cheese, and the house and microwave STILL smell. But on Wednesday, I asked him to fake it, and he said that he would. This Thursday, we’re gonna buy the needed supplies for my shelf, and come back over to my house. Maybe we can have a bit of fun. ;D I definitely enjoy that. I just wish I could find a guy who would love me back, and is freaking amazing. Oh, well.
It doesn’t feel any different, I guess. I love him so much and I don’t want him to leave, but I don’t think he’s enjoying anything, anymore. But I did lose my virginity to him, so we’ll always be connected. It really doesn’t feel any different. I can’t wait to see him, again. Even without the sex. I just love being in his arms.
Monday, I’m going to be calling various dance studios and veterinary offices for ballet classes and looking into the lump on Terri’s back. I’m hoping everything goes well! Tomorrow, I am going to Quizno’s to follow up on my application. I hope everything goes well, and improves.
So, yesterday was amazing. It was like Will and I were making up for the past few months being pretty shaky. We were having our usual amount of fun. But…I don’t know if I lost my virginity by dictionary definition or not. Oh well. It was amazing, and we both enjoyed it.
I’m hoping we stay together. I really do love him. He makes me feel amazing emotionally, which is more than I could have ever hoped for. <3